wth..

k, ionno if i should be happy or go jump off a cliff, cause i'm going to South Africa for holiday this December..

hiax...

22/8/11 11.33pm
I wonder what happened to "no regrets".

19/8/11 10.57pm
K fuck me. No regrets. No guts no glory.

Hiax...

The higher you climb, the more painful the fall...

Each time i try, i learn something new thinking that the next time i will succeed, only to realise that i failed even harder than the attempt before...

What stupid logic is that?

Updates

So Prelim 2 is bout 2 weeks away... After seeing my Prelim 1 results i think i've finally woken up... >.<

Very busy with tuition, work and studying now...

Thinking of dropping A Maths but i think i'll give it another try first... If my Prelim 2 results still suck i'm gonna drop it.

Somehow the Duel Masters trend has been revived O_o 4/4, 4/2 and 4/5 have started playing again O_o

Finally got something that i've been trying to put behind me for a long time off my mind. Feels so much better...

Not touched anime for quite some time, only watch it sometimes on Animax.

*Blog song has been updated also*
(Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood Opening 4, Chemistry - Period)

Ohh my comp crashed also, maybe its for the best anyway. No intention of getting it fixed.

Prelims Day 1

Prelims started today... 3 bloody papers in 1 day man wth...

E maths was ok I guess. Quite confident.
But guess what? I forgot to bring my long ruler and curve ruler.
So I bent my 15 cm ruler and used it to draw the curve...

Chem was ok also. I can safely say all the tuition payed off.
Still I think I made some really stupid mistakes...

English paper was a bore as always... 30mins doing, 1hr 10mins sleeping...

I've decided not to study for combined humanities this time round.
Don't have the time lol...

Ohh the new principal is an idiot... >.<
He screwed up out time table...
Each period is now 35mins.
And there's 3 periods of maths in a row... >.<
And also 3 periods of SS now... >.<

Ohh did I mention that we now have classes till 4.15pm >.< ...

Updates...

Well my holiday basically didn't seem like a holiday at all...

Mon till Sat, tuition from 12-5... Damn xian...

Holiday homework not done as usual.
Only this time I don't intend to do it...
Those 3 compre papers can just rot in a corner.

Dragged my ass down to Vivo and got myself a Crumpler bag. All the other colours were out of stock, so I only had the choice of the red one...
I feel stupid. I endured a 50min bus ride to Vivo. I took a train back and it only took 30mins...
An extra 20 mins wasted just cause i was lazy to go to the train station...

stupid Facebook...

Damn Facebook.

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Xian ttm...

Argh my holidays have been stuffed with extra classes and tuition... >.<

Best things is.. I've got Tuition from 1 to 5 every damn day this week and next...
What makes things worst is that tuition is at bugis... >.<

So I was thinking of getting myself a Crumpler bag O.o but I'll get it only if I'm able to drag my lazy ass to orchard...

Zzz...

As our lives go on,

I want to hold your hand and talk about our dreams,
and while I sleep, if just for a moment,
I want to be in your future.

Recently something happened to my heart,
and I've just been falsely blaming you.

You run away in shock,
while I quickly chase you like an idiot to say "I'm sorry."

These repeating days, have worn down my soul.

You tell me to "grow up," I get it,
but I'm just not that simple.

As our lives go on,

I want to play side by side with you,
and while I sleep, if just for a moment,
I want to be part of you.

Hiax...

Sometime I wonder and ask myself, why did I do it in the first place...
Cause now I really feel crappy and there's nothing that I can actually do about it...

I swear that this is the biggest mistake I've made...
And also the biggest regret of my life...

Sometimes I wish I had a time machine...
So I could go back in time and undo the mistakes that I made...

Thoughts keep running through my mind...
"What should I do now?"
"What were you hinting at?"
"What will happen in the end?"

I swear it's tormenting me...
It's like bell that keeps ringing continuously at the back of my head...
Its irritating...
And it keeps bothering me...
It just won't leave me alone...

Why did I even start something that I know I would never complete...

O.o

Either more people are viewing my blog than i expected, or my blog stats are screwed.

Ok I think my blog stats are screwed... 34 blogviews on a day that I didn't post anything... And an average of 3 or 4 views when I do actually post something...

Looks like Kian Sam is at the top of the list for blogviews followed by some jajas who see my post via MyBlogPost on facebook.

Zzz...

TMD... >.< yesterday I decided that from today onwards I would study in the study room cause studying in my room has resulted In my table being clutted with books and worksheets...

So this morning I moved all the stuff on my table into the study room... Then I went out for lunch. Had a 1 hr nap after I came back.

When I woke up there was some guy in the house. So I asked my mother who it was. And guess what?
The day I decide to study in the study room, my mother has to decide to change the cushions on the chairs in the study room... >.<

Best thing is it's going to take 2 weeks to replace the cushions...

So I had to move nvm everything back into my room... >.< and now my table is even more messy than it was this morning...

Why...

Why can't I stop thinking about you...
Nothing I try works...
I just can't seem to get you out of my head...
I cant seem to forget about you...

I swear this feeling sucks...
This feeling of confusion...
It's eating me from the inside out...

Should I try again?
Or should I just let you go...

I can't figure out what you were hinting at...
I'm afraid my decision isn't the option you were trying to tell me...
In that case what would happen...

It's ironic...
I keep saying to myself I'll try to stay out of your life...
But everytime you go online I can't resist starting a conversation...
Cause I do actually enjoy them...
Cause they are full of crap and nonsense...
Drifting from one stupid subject to another...

These conversations actually make my day...
And cheer me up after I've had a crappy day...

Some part of me hopes you won't be reading this...
But another part of me hopes you will actually read this...

Hiaz... Indecision gets me no where...

Tabidatsu...

Cherry blossoms dance under the chilly spring sky.
You march on, with dreams and hopes upon your shoulders.
I want to send you off as you begin your journey.
I should have done that seriously today.

I placed all my smiles in a bouquet of flowers
that I am sending to you along with a message:

Thank you for laughing with me.
Thank you for crying with me.
Don’t worry, you will be fine.
Just keep going straight in the path you believe in.
I opened my heart only to you
I am telling you my screets and all.

When it gets really, really hard,
You can just give me a call.
You’ll be okay, no matter how far apart we become.
You’ll be okay because I will always be your friend.

Even if you get married
Even if you grow old
No matter how much time passes
You will be my best friend I proud of.

The overflowing fake tears you set free deceived me.
On the other side of the moving window,
Your figure gradually draws further away
As you wave at me.

Thank you for laughing with me.
Thank you for crying with me.
In the times that keep changing
you keep marching on without changing.
Good-bye,
It starts from now on.
Good-bye,
I will always be your friend.
You will be fine,
You are not alone.
You’ll always have a place to go back to,
Right here.

hiax...

Its the day before O Level Chinese exam... and i'm having a fever... sway much? >.< anyway who cares... its only chinese... a subject i'm doomed to fail...

so i'm gonna give it another try... i'm not gonna use swear words online at least... damn, crap, bastard and screw are not counted...

recently somebody told me something very helpful.

You want to jump from step 2 to step 4!
Your missing step 3!

Best thing i've heard in a while man.

I'm not gonna let it go so easily. Gonna work on step 3.

updates...

I know i have not been posting for quite some time... this is cause i've been studying for my MYE... YES! I have been studying... But despite all that i still only passed 2 subjects... >.< is it the way i'm studying? or i'm not studying hard enough? i swear this is the hardest i have ever studied... Didn't do as well as i thought i would... Here i'll give you an example...

"If i fail geography i'll slap myself" *fail* wtf?!
"If i fail physics i'll not play comp for a day" *fail* WTF?!
"If i fail english i'll not play comp for another day and forfeit my cash items" *fail* WTF?!

PTC later on today... I think i'm going to get slaughtered... I figure my L1R5 is about 45... plus minus a bit... >.<

Had some "motivational talk" yesterday... Totally boring... >.< And totally useless in my opinion... Spent the time slacking instead of listening...

Went back to see the Charlies's first training as an NCO last week... Wasn't too bad actually... Just some minor mistakes here and there... Happy to see how good they have become... Keep it up guys! But still, you know what my request of you guys is... Settle it quickly... Or you guys will regret... I've been getting a few request for me to go see the trainings... But you guys have to understand that i need to let go... If u want, I can come... But not that often... Maybe once a month or something like that...

Seems like my holidays aren't going to be holidays at all... Packed full of extra lessons... And guess what? They go through the whole day... 6++ Hours or physics and maths a day... How the hell to tahan... >.<

With all these extra lessons, how the hell am i going to find time to actually study for Prelim 1... Argh... >.<...

epic shitz.

Last paper today... Practical exam... Which I screwed up the Physics part... I know its only MYE, but it feels like O Levels are over... >.< LAN-ed with kianny, shei, leslie, saimen today. Blackshot-ed with brendan, js, andrew, bq, shawn err i think i missing 1 name i cant remember who :P Damn fun time today. Not had to much fun in ages... Last match they sore :P deny me of my MVP!

I never dreamt it'd be this way
I've lost any chance for me to say
To say that I miss you, say that I love you
Will someone please tell me I'm okay

I wasn't prepared for what's to come
A life made of memories gone so young
And now I'm regretting all I've done
But in your heart know that I'm with you all along

Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
I'm in your heart tonight

I never thought that this could go
And take me away from all I know
And leave me to think I'm on my own
But your love will take me, you were the one...

Who sat through nights
You held me tight
And made sure I'm okay
And I thank you for the love you gave to me

Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright

And if I should fall, I know you're waiting
And if I should call, I know you're there
If ever you cry just know
I'm in your heart tonight...

why...

I hate this feeling... its so damn botherly... i wish it would just go away...

haix...

Flowers for your hair,
Rainbows for your eyes to see,
Your dreams are everywhere,
To carry you away from me,

Ohh there she goes,
So beautiful,
Shes flying home...

Ohh there she goes,
So beautiful,
But she said she don't know who i am...